Synopsis
One day, Jiao Bai came across a small bookshop on the way home and went in. With a face full of fatherly love, the shop keeper recommended a batch of new releases. They were all boys love comics. Jiao Bai happily went home but was struck flying by a car at the intersection in front of his house. When he opened his eyes again, he found himself inside a dog-blood[1], scum-cheap[2] boys’ love[3] comic with a bad ending[4].
Hehehe.
Jiao Bai lay on the large white bed with a serene face and hands crossed on his stomach. He had become one of the scum gong's[5]… step-mother candidates.
Oh, by the way, the cheap protagonist shou[6] of this comic was the white moonlight[7] of the character that he had transmigrated into.
Now, the person currently scrubbing himself in the bathroom was the old friend of the scum gong's dad and inside the room next to this one, were the scum gong's dad and that old friend's “Little Hot Pepper.”
Don’t ask, asking means a warning of true love.
【Your friend has come online.】
Shou: Jiao Bai
Gong: Qi Yilao
The path to your heart leads to the crematorium.
Reading Guide:
Happy Ending, 1V1
Shou is 19, Gong is 33, 14 year age difference, Gong doesn't appear much in the beginning. The romance doesn't begin until the latter half of the novel.
Author’s Logic is Dead | Mindless Writing | Has An Old-School Dog Blood Flavour[8]| The Setting and Plot Are Entirely Fictional | The Views of Characters Do Not Represent the Author’s Views | Criticizing the Author Might Lead to Hair Loss
The Shou Has a 'Heartthrob' Tendency[9] | Go Wild and Create Your Own Fan Content | If It’s Not to Your Taste, Feel Free to Close the Page | Wishing for World Peace
Chapter 1
Jiao Bai squatted under the table, holding his breath as he stared at his slightly rough, unfamiliar hands with a pale face. His black fringe was drenched with sweat.
The sound of water splashing in the bathroom was like a death sentence. Jiao Bai came back to his senses. He shrank further beneath the table, hugging his legs, burying his head in his arms with his eyes tightly closed and eyelashes trembling. Moments later, he abruptly opened his eyes and cursed aloud.
“Etbj!!!”
Jiao Bai had a cold and a fever, and his throat really hurt. After cursing, his mouth tasted both fishy and salty. Had he committed unforgivable sins in his past life? Why did he have to suffer so many misfortunes in this one? After he lost his parents at a young age, he was taken in by his uncle, who took custody of him under the pretext of temporarily managing his parents’ assets. What awaited him was his aunt's scorn and constant criticism. While he was living like he was more dead than alive, he stepped into the rotten world[10] through a friend’s introduction. He relied on those BL comics to get through every month and every year while maintaining grades above the admission requirements for his dream university.
The 7th of the next month was his eighteenth birthday and also the day of his university entrance exam. He was about to embark on a new stage of life. Who could have predicted that he would get into a car accident right outside his house on his way home from school, clutching a new comic he had just bought.
When he opened his eyes again, he was inside a tragic scum-gong cheap-shou BL comic that he read half a month ago, and had become Wang Chuqiu.
The person in the bathroom was the charismatic chairman of the Qi Group—a supporting character who wasn’t romantically involved with either protagonist, but was still so popular he had his own Weibo account and an enormous CP fanclub[11], Qi Yilao[12].
Jiao Bai had no idea what had transpired in this room between Chairman Qi and the original owner of this body. The comic didn't say. All he remembered was that the author disclosed late in the story that Wang Chuqiu left in the middle of the night. As soon as he went out, he was hit by a black car that came out of nowhere, dying on the way to the hospital.
In other words,
Jiao Bai took a deep breath. He was a cannon fodder who would soon receive a lunch box[13].
The smell of the lunch box had already wafted over.
Jiao Bai fiercely rubbed his eyes and sniffed. He zoned out under the table for a while before he crawling out in a daze. He absentmindedly crawled onto the large white bed nearby and crossed his hands over his stomach. A serene expression appeared on his bloodless face.
Serenely... waiting to die.
He had died once anyway so dying again wasn’t such a big deal. Different the first time, easy the second.
That was all atkkrghs!
Jiao Bai bit his lip hard enough to draw blood. He licked it away and allowed the taste of iron to spread across his tongue. He covered his face and mumbled, “I don’t want to die...”
I don’t want to die again.
But how was he going to break out of this deadlock?
Jiao Bai spread his fingers out and peered at the door through the gaps. Outside were Qi Yilao’s bodyguards and cronies. Sneaking out was not an option.
His eyes darted anxiously around the room before landing on the backpack resting against the wall opposite him.
That’s right, the phone!
Jiao Bai sprang off the bed and rushed over at lightning speed. When he grasped the phone, his lips trembled slightly. With Qi Yilao’s influence, only three people in the whole of A city could challenge him.
One of them happened to be in Jiao Bai’s contacts.
Shen Ji.
However, Jiao Bai stared at the number for a long time without dialling it. Shen Ji was the father of Shen Er’an, the protagonist scum gong in the comic, and in a way, the sugar czccx of the original Wang Chuqiu. Right now, Shen Ji was next door, separated by just one wall.
But Jiao Bai couldn’t call Shen Ji for help.
The light in Jiao Bai’s eyes disappeared. The reason why he was in this current predicament was because Shen Ji had taken an interest in a certain rdwx little hot pepper.
That little hot pepper belonged to Qi Yilao and was known as “Little Hot Pepper” in the comic. He had a fiery personality and loved to wear red dresses. He was very flirtatious and was very good at stirring up trouble. He played a part in the dog-blood plotline later in the story.
Shen Ji was now eating him next door.
As for Jiao Bai, when Shen Ji proposed exchanging partners with Qi Yilao, he had expressed that he wouldn’t care whether or not Jiao Bai lived to see the next day.
Jiao Bai paced back and forth in the room. If he wanted to save himself, he could only do so on his own.
How to save himself? Jiao Bai smacked his phone against his head. Calm down. He had read the comic. He had a golden finger. There must be something he could use. Quick, think!
Jiao Bai suddenly looked towards the window.
This was “Di Ye[14],” the largest entertainment club in South City, a place of relaxation for the upper class.
Qi Yilao had a private room in “Di Ye.” One of his character traits was that he was afraid of heights, so shouldn’t his room be located on a lower floor?
Why not try jumping out of the window?
Jiao Bai swiftly ran to the window and pulled open the curtain. There were no burglar bars?! He poked his head out and looked. First floor! It was actually the first floor! Fantastic, fantastic, fantastic, heaven never bars one’s way!
The next moment, his teeth throbbed with pain and he silently took a few steps backwards.
What was wrong with Qi Yilao? He came here seeking pleasure. Ordering his men to guard outside the door should already be enough, but there were guards outside the window as well!
Not only that, outside the window was an indoor courtyard.
A place as extravagant as “Di Ye” also has a courtyard??? What’s the story behind that large field of tulips? The comic hadn’t mentioned anything like this.
“Click.”
The bathroom door suddenly opened from the inside.
Jiao Bai’s whole body stiffened, and the pores on his back opened instantly. He was facing the bathroom door so he had no time to control his expression before a gust of steamy, fragrant air hit him right in the face.
A man in a grey bathrobe walked into the room, gently closing the bathroom door behind him. He looked to be in his thirties, tall and straight. His black hair was damp. Water dripped from his hair on his forehead and slid over his full, defined brows.
Jiao Bai’s mouth hung open, eyes wide, staring blankly at the comic character approaching him.
Qi Yilao’s appearance was identical to how it had been drawn in the comic, but because he was alive and three-dimensional, he felt even more dazzling. He looked easy-going and friendly, yet there was an irresistible air of authority and elegance about him.
Jiao Bai’s heart pounded wildly, his brain swelled with blood and his limbs were weak. This wasn't a reaction brought about by attraction—it was physiological anxiety.
He felt dizzy, his vision was doubling, and the heaviness brought by fever grew stronger.
“Qi, Qi…” Jiao Bai was tongue-tied and choked on his own spit. He coughed a few times. His voice sounded even more unpleasant, like the uncanny sound emitted from an old, worn-out record player.
Jiao Bai’s palms were sweating. As someone who had read comics for a long time, he had seen stories similar to this so he knew that the protagonist would typically inherit the memories of the original owner of the body, but why hadn't he?
How did the original Wang Chuqiu address Qi Yilao? Jiao Bai couldn’t breathe properly and felt like he was about to suffocate. He pulled out every title and address used for Qi Yilao in the comic.
Qi-ye[15], Chairman Qi, Uncle Qi, Mr. Qi, San-ge[16].
Let’s rule out the most unlikely fifth title first, and the remaining four… are all equally plausible.
Jiao Bai tentatively called out, “Chairman Qi.”
A gaze pierced through the light and landed on him.
Jiao Bai instantly broke out into cold sweat. Did he guess wrong? Just as he was preparing to come up with a way to bluff his way out, the man walked past him and sat on the sofa behind him.
“Why are you still here?” Qi Yilao’s voice was deep and gentle with a hint of confusion.
Jiao Bai stared blankly at him. So, can I leave now? He felt slightly dizzy, and couldn’t make sense of what was going on right now, so he just stood there stupidly.
“With Mr. Shen… Didn’t you two…”
“You don’t need to worry about that.” Qi Yilao took a brown towel to wipe his hair, and the sleeves of his bathrobe slid up to reveal a lightly tanned forearm which emitted the clean scent of grass after rain.
For real? Then I seriously won’t worry about it, okay? Jiao Bai took a moment to get himself into the right emotional state and then pretended to choke back tears. “Chairman Qi, please take me.” He lowered his head, exposing a delicate nape beneath the man’s gaze.
“Stop that. Lao Shen[17] was drunk. How can you take him seriously?” Qi Yilao said sternly with a frown and then continued, softening his tone, “At the time, I only agreed because I thought it would be too troublesome to refuse. I don't have any such needs myself. My subordinates misunderstood.” He placed the towel on the back of the chair and ran his slightly damp black hair through his defined fingers. “You may leave now. Go home, take a bath, and have a good sleep. Take a more relaxed view on things and find your place, and you can avoid unnecessary troubles.”
Qi Yilao’s words were filled with the concern of an elder and his every gesture was gentle.
The room was silent.
Jiao Bai lowered his head and stared at his toes. This development deviated from what he'd expected by a long shot. In the comic, Wang Chuqiu stayed here until the middle of the night and was hit by a car when he left so Jiao Bai originally wanted to take the opportunity to sneak out of the room now and then go on from there. However, he didn’t manage to. He ended up facing off with Qi Yilao and had still been coming up with a way to deal with him, when Qi Yilao told him to leave. On top of that, Qi Yilao looked like he had wanted him to leave a long time ago and was surprised that he was here. Jiao Bai sounded him out and his response was consistent. It appeared that Qi Yilao truly didn't want him to stay.
Then what was up with the original plot?
Jiao Bai didn't know where the problem was and didn't know where to even start looking, so he decided to organise the information he had about Qi Yilao’s character.
Qi Yilao’s character information wasn’t explicitly stated. The only thing the comic revealed was that he was a powerful real estate mogul in West City with the charm of a mature man and an endless succession of lovers. The character himself wasn't fully fleshed out, appearing only sparingly throughout the story, each time accompanied by a young man—some beautiful, some slender, some striking, and there were also average-looking, fair and plump, and simple and honest-looking...
All various kinds but they all shared the common trait of being well-behaved little pets.
In terms of appearance, skills, social status, experience and charisma, Qi Yilao stood head and shoulders above the rest. No matter the occasion, he would always be the absolute centre of attention. Naturally, such a character would not have an official partner, and fans enthusiastically created all sorts of pairings for him, shipping him with any character possible and even going as far as breaking up the official main couple just to pair him with one of them.
A rumour circulated on the internet that Qi Yilao would be the main character of the author's next work, but not long after, the author denied this rumour. She said in a fan group chat that Qi Yilao would not have an official partner—instead, he belonged to the fans.
Jiao Bai had a feeling that he couldn’t describe—he was a lover of tragic endings, preferring “I love you, but you don't love me back, then you do eventually, but I don't anymore,” or “you love me, but I'm dying” type plots, and never tired of it. On top of that, he was also a protagonist-devotee, and would skip over all the content with the supporting characters. Back when he was reading Broken Wings, he noticed Qi Yilao purely because he was ensnared by the author’s art style.
It wasn’t just Qi Yilao. Jiao Bai also didn't skip over any of the other supporting characters’ scenes. Those faces and legs, ah, every pen stroke was crazy splits on his F-rons.
Now the two-dimensional world had become three-dimensional, and the real person stood before Jiao Bai, but he was no longer in the mood to fawn over him. Jiao Bai’s identity and circumstances had undergone a complete transformation, and survival was his top priority.
Jiao Bai secretly made his own calculations. Qi Yilao’s territory lay in West City and he had come to South City to celebrate the Madam Shen’s[18] birthday. Once it was over, he would go back.
If he could hook up with Qi Yilao...
Jiao Bai’s mind grew increasing calm. Aside from Qi Yilao, there were other supporting characters who didn’t participate in the main plot nor get involved in the romantic relationship between the protagonist couple, but there weren’t many that could make the Shen Family show deference to them.
From every angle, Qi Yilao was the most useful option.
If he could find a way to go to West City with Qi Yilao, then escaping at a later time would become much easier.
Since he had entered the comic world, he ought to live well and try his best to survive.
His life’s starting point of life had shifted here. Since he needed to come up with a new dream, he might as well dream big.
——I hope that I can live a long and worry-free life here.
The moment that thought crossed Jiao Bai’s mind, an electronic sound exploded in his head.
【 The player’s will to survive has exceeded the threshold, and the building dreams belief requirement has also been met. Click this link to activate your account. 】
A link appeared out of thin air in front of Jiao Bai, leaving him dumbstruck.
【 Account activation will begin automatically in five seconds. 】
【 Five, four, three... The delay is excessively long. The cache needs to be cleared again. Please wait patiently. 】
Jiao Bai was speechless.
This server was trash.
【 Player account activated. Account: Jiao Bai. Initial password: 000000. Logging in... 】
Jiao Bai looked at the list before him.
→My Friends: 0/20.
Who are these people? As soon as Jiao Bai thought of this, the list opened, and twenty friends appeared in his field of vision.
He didn’t recognise a single one of them.
Jiao Bai’s scalp went cold. Could this be what he thought it was?
As if to confirm his suspicions, a second later, “My Boyfriend: 0/0” appeared under “My Friends.”
Jiao Bai stiffly scanned the names on the friend list.
This wasn’t right.
None of these people were characters from this comic. Wrong...wrong, wrong!
Jiao Bai screamed internally at the top of his lungs, System, assistant, guardian, or whatever you are, quick, look, you guys have a bug!
【 Warning! After analysis, player Jiao Bai’s data does not match this world. Transmission error detected. Please send the player back to the correct world line immediately. 】
【 Warning! Warning! Player is already bound to Wang Chuqiu, a person who is about to die in this world, and cannot be unbound. Return failed. 】
Jiao Bai was still in a state of shock. Everything was fine now, right?
Etbj, good thing he wasn't sent to that world with those twenty people, or else he’d have to live a life out his days pooping and pissing his pants[19].
【 This world is not listed under R-Rated. Player Jiao Bai's account information will need to be updated. 】
【 Account updating... 】
【 Account update complete... 】
→My friends 1/1
Qi Yilao
Jiao Bai wiped away the cold sweat on his forehead and let out a long sigh of relief. For now, he decided to ignore everything else. Having only one friend on the list put his mind at ease.
【Currently adding friends… 】
Jiao Bai: Bye-bye.
[1] Dog Blood (狗血, gǒu xiě) is used to describe extremely melodramatic, sensational, or overly clichéd plotlines.
Common features:
· Over-the-top drama - dramatic twists, improbable coincidences, overblown conflicts
· Unrealistic elements - highly improbable events or character decisions
· Excessive conflict - love triangles, misunderstandings, shocking betrayals, dramatic reveals
· Emotional manipulation - extreme or sensational scenarios, tear-jerking moments overly tragic outcomes
· Cliched tropes - amnesia, sudden reversals or fortune, melodramatic love-hate relationships
[2] Scum-Cheap trope - 渣贱 (zhā jiàn) – this is a toxic relationship trope where one person is a scumbag who mistreats or abuses the other person. The other person, however, still loves or stays with the scumbag despite the mistreatment/abuse.
渣 (zhā) translates to 'scum' and in this context refers to the gong.
贱 (jiàn) translates to 'cheap' and in this context refers to the shou. 贱 (jiàn) implies a lack of dignity, integrity, or self-respect. It denotes someone who engages in behaviour that is considered degrading - For example, the shou has no self-respect and is degrading themselves by staying with the scumbag gong.
[3] Boys' Love (BL) - a genre of that focuses on romantic relationships between male characters.
[4] BE (Bad Ending): A genre or storyline where the conclusion is tragic or unsatisfactory.
[5] Gong (攻) - one of the archetypes within the gay romantic relationship dynamic - top during fzx rdw - one who sticks it in. Seme in Japanese. The character who is typically dominant, assertive, or more proactive in the relationship.
[6] Shou (受) - one of the archetypes within the gay romantic relationship dynamic - bottom during fzx rdw - one who has it stuck into. Uke in Japanese. The character who is often portrayed as more passive, emotionally vulnerable, or submissive in the relationship.
[7] White Moonlight - is used metaphorically to describe a person that holds a special place in someone’s heart. That person is usually their unattainable and unforgettable first love.
[8] The story includes melodramatic or clichéd elements that are reminiscent of older BL mangas.
[9] 万人迷 (wàn rén mí) – ‘Heartthrob’ Tendency - The literal translation of "万人迷" is "a person who is loved by ten thousand people." Often translated as 'heartthrob.'
A character that is described as wàn rén mí is universally adored and admired by others in the story. Sometimes this is deserved (because the character has a magnetic personality or exceptional qualities that draw admiration and affection from everyone around them) and sometimes it's just because the author wants every character in the story to fall in love with that character.
[10] He became a fan of BL
[11] Fans of his character created a Weibo account for him. Weibo is a popular Chinese social media platform that functions similarly to Twitter and Facebook.
CP stands for couple and CP fanclub is a fanclub where his fans ship him with other characters.
[12] The last character of his name 潦 can be pronounced ‘lao’ or ‘liao.’ I’m not sure which one it is so I’m using ‘lao’ until I work out the right one. If it’s ‘lao’ it means flooded, heavy rain. If it’s ‘liao,’ it’s used as one of the characters to make up the words 潦倒 (down on one's luck; to be on the rocks; frustrated; hapless and dejected) and 潦草 (slovenly; careless)
[13] 炮灰 (pàohuī) – cannon fodder – disposable side character that is only used to further the plot.
Lunch box - An actor receives a boxed meal when he has finished filming his part – phrase used by movie readers when a character dies.
[14] 缔夜 (dì yè) - made up of the words ‘connection/knot’ and ‘night’
[15] 戚爷 – Qi-ye – Master Qi - 戚 (Qī): surname. 爷 (yé): means "grandfather" or "sir" and is used to address an older or distinguished man in a polite and formal manner. It is used to show respect and often indicates that the person is of high status or older.
[16] 三哥 – San-ge – Third Brother - is a way of addressing or referring to the third-born son among siblings in a family, or it can denote a senior male figure with the position of the third brother in a particular context or group. It often conveys familiarity and respect, indicating a close or hierarchical relationship.
[17] 老沈 (lǎo shěn) – Old Shen - "老" (lǎo) is often used as a prefix to refer to someone with respect or familiarity, indicating seniority or simply to signify that the person is older. 沈 (shěn) is Shen Ji’s surname.
[18] 沈老太太 - Shěn lǎo tàitai – Madam Shen/elderly Mrs. Shen - 老太太 (lǎo tàitai) - is a respectful and somewhat formal way to refer to an elderly woman
[19] He’s probably thinking that that world with 20 friends is a harem world where he has multiple boyfriends. Hence, living a life with bladder and bowel incontinence.
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